They have lost people dear to their hearts. Fathers. Friends. Children.
It is loss, loss, loss.
And I saw someone today who spontaneously broke into tears when we met eyes.
This is the body and the mind doing their beautiful work.
Our tears are full of all of our frustration. Our sadness. Our inability to change what life has handed us.
Grief, in all its forms, is the way humans move forward. Our rituals are an elegant example of how we celebrate a soul leaving at the same time that we publicly grieve them. It says to the world, “I love the person who has died. I am so deeply sad. And I love you. Thank you for witnessing my grief and sharing it with me.”
This idea of crying and witnessing…of holding someone while they grieve, this IS what it is to be a toddler and preschooler.
Their emotions ARE this big.
We parents don’t like to think so. We like to downplay everything. We like to apply our savvy rationale to everything. “How silly. How small. How unimportant.”
But to a three year old? Loss is loss is loss.
And what works for US (witnessing, holding, talking, acknowledging, kindness, hugging, a smile) works for CHILDREN.
Oh, humans have complicated so much with our studies and our books and our trends…but everything is so damn elemental.
So shared.
So true.
You don’t have to look anywhere or read one book to know how to help someone grieve.
Just be brave enough to do it.